Owwww!!!!! 79 degrees on a fine Georgia day!!!! I worked out AND got my car washed. Plus I studied without falling into a coma!! So there is only one thing left to do: Provide you, the reader, with something to read before you go out tonight (Because we all know reading before clubbing increases the likelihood of meeting your future baby mama/daddy!! Info from the Internet so it must be true!!)
On a serious note, I had a conversation with a friend of mine and we talked about the difficulties of being in a relationship. He said "Sunn....you know we're damaged goods, right?" I said "N.....Go on." He said "We come from a generation of dudes who have dated either women who have been in relationships while we messed with them or engaged or married." I said "Ummm....you may have a point." He then said, "Sh$t like that has ruined my perspective on being with someone long term."
Unfortunately, I can't disagree with a single thing he said. He then asked me, "Is this going into the blog?" I said "Shut up," and ran away. But seriously, I commend all men and women who have found true happiness with the person they're with. I have trouble seeing myself with someone long term, not because I don't believe in love, but because I have major trust issues. I always feel like karma is going to come and bite me in the ass and take some meat out (Awesome visual if you've seen my buttcheeks! Pause). I'm getting a dose of that right now but that's for a later blog.
When I was 19, I messed with a married 33 year old with children. It was a brief fling but one that made me hate marriage for a time due to what I felt was a blatant disregard for the wedding vows. She told me that her husband never made time for her and that she felt like the only way to get back at him was to sleep around. At 19, I felt like I was the man....for a second. Then those damn morals kicked in and I cut it off (At this time I messed with a married woman, a stripper, a few randoms, a partridge and a pear tree. Sheesh).
In fact, there was a time when all I was dealing with were females in relationships. The best was when a woman got into a fight with her fiancee, came by my home and danced for me and a few of my friends. While all of these occasions were awesome, it kind of ruined the way I felt about relationships and how I acted when in them. I was always paranoid that a woman would get back at me like that. So, instead of taking care of business to prevent this from happening, I would always try to one up the situation and cheat first. Eventually, in a relationship, it did happen, but I totally deserved it due to the ridiculousness things I did. So here I am today, finally (literally starting a few weeks ago) getting over the past and ready to start anew. I still have friends who are anti-everything having to do with relationships. I take their commentary, remember who I am dealing with, and keep it moving. I feel like just taking this summer to continue to work on myself, setting and accomplishing goals, and letting the chips fall where they may. I no longer feel like I am damaged. I just look at it like I have a perspective that not many people have. With age and experience come wisdom. And with that, I'm gone.......
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